Your Choices Define Who You Are
by BlueRubyBeat
Summary: Do you ever wonder what Regulus Black went through and how he died...Well here's a way to find out.


**Your Choices Define Who You Are**

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the Harry Potter characters, J.K. Rowling does.

"Avada Kedavra!" – Speaking

'Knowledge is power!' – Thoughts

*Numa Numa Dance* – Actions

**~.~**

**Regulus POV**

Whoever said that joining the Dark Lord was a good idea? Yes, some of his ideals are great, like separating the Muggle and Magical world, making muggleborn students go to school before attending Hogwarts because we purebloods are ahead of them and we have to wait for them to catch up before advancing in class. There are many others but recently I haven't liked what's been happening, if I did at all. I do not like killing and many Death Eaters are doing just that, it's quite horrible. I like casting curses as much as any pureblood but it's ridiculous and a little frightening at how creative some of my companions are.

Like my cousin Bellatrix Lestrange née Black. *Shiver* Her favorite curse was the Cruciatus Curse, and she doesn't just use it on muggle or muggleborns but also Death Eaters. I have been one of her favorite victims and I'm from the Most Ancient and Noble House of Black. She should be bowing to me not the other way around.

*Sigh* I wish Siri could help me like he promised…

**~~Flashback Start~~**

"_Reg," Sirius whispered to me as we lay in my bed in the dead of night._

"_Yes Siri?" I whisper back, we didn't want to wake our parents or we'd get punished again, usually with Sirius getting cursed and making me watch._

"_Leave with me."_

_I didn't think I heard him right, "W-what?"_

"_Leave with me. I can't take the pain of the Cruciatus Curse anymore and I can't stand to see you in pain. I know I'm only 16 and you 14, but we cannot continue living in this house," Sirius exclaimed quietly, his voice sounding serious._

"_We can't. Mother and father expect us to join the Dark Lord when we graduate."_

_Growling lowly Sirius continued to persuade me, "I will __never__ join the Dork Lord! And you shouldn't either, his ideals aren't that good anymore!"_

_I disagreed and told him so, but that made him even angrier, "You don't understand Reg! He wishes to exterminate muggleborns and muggles because he believes them to be dirty. And he's changed something fierce. H-he scares me Reg…"_

_I never heard that kind of voice from Sirius before and for once I was scared, "B-but w-we'll be hunted! How will we finish school?"_

"_Our Hogwarts schooling is fully paid for until we graduate, don't worry about that little brother," he consoled me._

_I know that reassured me but I couldn't help but feel like I'd die if I left our home, "I still don't believe we should leave. We'll definitely die! What if they send Bella to attack us?"_

"_Regulus, listen closely…You're my little brother and I will always protect you, but you __have__ to pick me instead of our family. I don't want to lose you, you're the only one who knows exactly what I'm feeling and what I've been through."_

"_What about your __friends__?" I asked, my tone filled with jealousy._

"_I haven't told them much of home, just bits and pieces to keep them satisfied and away from our life. So Reg, will you run away with me?" He turned to me and I could feel his breath so I whispered, "Yes Siri, I'll run away with you."_

_Sirius then hugged me tight and whispered reassurances and promises in my ear about how we'd get away and live free._

**~~Flashback End~~**

He didn't know that Mother and Father dosed me with a dark potion much like the Imperious Curse. *Laughs insanely* If he did I wouldn't be in this mess. I wouldn't be dying and wishing that we were born to a different family, but at least Sirius got free.

Right now though, I'm in a dark cave that Kreacher, my house elf, took me to. I asked him what the Dark Lord needed him for and he told me the word 'Horcrux'. I was horrified! No wonder the Dark Lord was insane, he _split _his _soul_ and put them into items. I don't think he could be classified as a human being anymore, more like a _monster_. I couldn't stand back and let that…that being do anymore damage. I wanted to break free from the potion but it was strong, and maybe, just maybe I might be strong enough for this.

I know this won't redeem my soul for all the people I've killed. I didn't want to do it but I'm just too weak-willed to break free. If only I was like Sirius, brave and with a will of steel, then I'd be living happily with him, away from all this madness.

I couldn't help but feel I would never see My Siri again…Maybe this was punishment for my stupidity and picking Slytherin over Ravenclaw…all those dark families (mine included) all expect their little children to become Death Eaters like themselves or because _they_ didn't want to be _branded_ like cattle. *Snort* What dumb luck to be born to this family…

Breaking from my thoughts I looked around the cave where Kreacher brought me. I'm standing on a little island with a basin with a locket and filled with some sort of liquid, and because this was from the Dark Lord, I don't think it's a very friendly substance. But this was my only chance to release myself from this living hell.

"Kreacher," I called.

"Yes Master?" My house elf answered.

"No matter what happens, you must take the locket from here and destroy it," I commanded.

"But Master, what about you?"

"No Kreacher, the locket is your main priority, I'll get myself out, but if I cannot, you cannot come back for me. And you _can't_ tell the Dark Lord _anything_, do not even talk about it. Do you understand your orders?"

"Yes Master," Kreacher replied. I knew this was going to be tough, but I knew I could do it. Siri would be proud of me, I just knew it!

I looked to the basin and asked Kreacher how to remove the liquid and his reply was to drink it all. I sighed knowing this would be a tremendous task but I was ready and made sure Kreacher knew to put the fake locket in the basin when I took out the real one.

For the next 30 minutes I sat on the rock leaning against the basin while Kreacher fed me the liquid from it. It was _horrible_ but I had to finish. While drinking the liquid I watched memories of the bad times in my life and the broken future I so desperately wanted. Crying through the memories I finished the liquid and took out the locket and gave it to Kreacher and he put the fake one in and the liquid refilled the basin.

"Ah!" I cried, my through parched, I looked around wildly for something to drink and I saw the lake so I crawled to the edge and started drinking from the water. It felt like a bad idea but I just _had_ to quench my thirst.

And what a bad idea it was as hands appeared from the water and started to drag me down, down, down. I struggled against them but I didn't have the strength so I just gave up and thought, 'I love you Siri! Please forgive me!'


End file.
